Finding Love (episode 7)
You have never truly experienced emotional pain until you are in a situation whereby you are unable to feel, touch and see the person you love, for a long period of time. On hearing the sad news of Alex’s departure, my heart broke a thousand times and my whole body suddenly became numb. Not in a thousand years would I have thought that Alex would ever be far away from me. Long distance relationships are good but I never pictured myself being in such situation, Ever!
“You are joking right?” I shockingly asked, “I wish I was, my flight is set to leave next week” Alex sadly replied and my heart dropped. I was still trying to wrap my head around the fact that he was traveling to Canada, and here he was, informing me that his flight was set to leave the next week.
My head started aching badly and my hands wouldn’t stop shaking. The whole shocking reveal was too much for me to handle at once. “Do you have to go? I mean there are a lot of nice schools you can attend in this country” I said with tears in my eyes. Alex was broken and didn’t know what else to say because he figured I had started crying. “Baby, I wish I could do something to change the situation but it’s sad that this one is beyond me” he sadly explained but I wasn’t understanding anything he was saying; all I wanted was for him to tell me everything was a big joke, but it was sad that was the reality on ground.
We had to end the call because emotions had already began to flare up. Immediately the call ended, the tears in my eyes started falling uncontrollably. I sobbed quietly and used my handkerchief to wipe away the tears on my cheeks. Words would totally fail me if I were to describe exactly how I felt after that call. At that moment, nothing else mattered to me, as I was lost in great thoughts. I suffered from panic attack and almost collapsed in school if it wasn’t for my friend who quickly boarded a taxi and took me home.
While at my apartment, I sobbed bitterly till my body started heating up. I had headache which later resulted to high temperature. I kept thinking of how I would cope without the man I loved by my side. We live in a world where technology has made communication easier quite alright, but there was no way ‘Face time or Skype’ could replace the ability to feel and touch the man I loved. I just wanted Alex around and of close reach, not thousands of miles away from me.
One thing I knew for sure was that I wasn’t going to be alright if Alex eventually traveled. I wasn’t emotionally ready to handle that sort of sudden development in our relationship. Alex called later that evening to inform me that he would be coming over for the weekend to see me before he leaves for Canada. For some weird reasons, I wasn’t excited; probably because I had been crying my eyes out since he broke the sad news to me.
Just as promised, Alex came visiting on Friday and arrived at my house around passed 6:30pm; I was back from school then and gladly welcomed him. The atmosphere wasn’t filled with excitement as usual, but was rather tensed. Alex brought a lot of goodies and gifts for me but I wasn’t so excited to receive them; I only thanked him and collected the items from him.
One look into my eyes and Alex could tell I was hurting badly. He didn’t even know where to start talking from or even what to say. After a little while of silence, Alex finally spoke; “Baby you know I love you and would never deliberately or intentionally hurt you. I wish I met you earlier, I definitely wouldn’t have applied to further my education abroad, this whole arrangements happened way before we met. I’m so sorry for being the reason you have to go through all this emotional stress, I’m truly sorry babe. It’s not like I’m going to be away forever, it’s just for a short period of time. You would be in my heart as far as I’m concerned and I’ll wait for you, no matter how long or whatever it takes. Chi chi, I need you to be strong for me and never lose focus of our beautiful future together. I love you and that would never change” He said.
Hearing those beautiful words of assurance from Alex made me emotional, and I didn’t know when I started shedding tears. Alex moved closer and hugged me tightly; “Just be strong, I’ll be back before you realised that I’m even gone” he said as I laid my head on his shoulder, “I love you baby and miss you already” I managed to say as I sobbed.
Alex gave me a soft peck on my forehead and I held him tightly. We hugged each other for a long time before breaking loose. Alex had to shower afterwards so he went to the bathroom while I microwaved the food I prepared earlier for him.
When I was done setting dinner for two, I came out of the kitchen and realised that Alex was still in the bathroom. I gently pulled my clothes off and knocked on the door; “Baby can I join you?” I asked and Alex said ‘Sure! Come in’. I opened the door and drew closer to him as the water from the shower cascaded on us.
Alex held my waist and pulled me closer to him. My baby has a very fine body, it was one to die for indeed. His body was masculine and well built while mine was extremely soft and fragile. Alex used the sponge to gently scrub my body while I looked into his eyes. I suddenly remembered the reality on ground and started tearing up again. Alex bent and gently kissed my eyes, but that didn’t stop the tears from failing off. He jacked me up and I locked my legs behind him.
The atmosphere started heating up and Alex started sucking my upper body like his life depended on it. I held his head and ran my fingers through his hair as I m0aned in pleasure. The bathroom wasn’t doing justice to complement that moment so Alex carried me to the room and gently laid me on the bed. Water was still dripping from our bodies but we cared less.
Alex handled me in a way he had never done before and I could vividly remember calling him all sorts of nasty sweet names as I m0aned in pleasure. He took me to cloud nine in ecstasy and made me feel like a woman. In all that happened, we still didn’t make Love and Alex didn’t try to force me to give in. It was a beautiful night to remember and I wished it lasted forever. Alex made sure to make it a memorable one indeed.
The remaining days of his little visit was quite beautiful, as we tried our best to remain positive and happy. Alex had to leave on Sunday evening and it was the saddest ‘Goodbye’ I had ever said to anyone. I cried all through his leaving and he tried to console me before he finally left.
My life felt lonely already and I always sobbed whenever no one was watching. Alex called me every now and then to check up on me because he knew I was seriously hurting. The D-day for his departure finally came and we were on video call all through his stay at the airport till it was finally time for him to board his flight.
Even though it was painful watching him go, I was happy for the bold step he was talking in his life and wished him all the best in his academic pursuit. We finally said our last goodbyes before he disconnected the call.
I sat on my bed that morning crying and didn’t want to go anywhere. I felt so empty and broken. It was too much sad emotions for me to handle at once. I felt devastated!
Just as I laid down on my bed sobbing, my phone beeped and I looked to see what it was, and saw an SMS from an unknown number. I sadly opened the message and it read ‘Chichi, I’m parked in front of your apartment, please come out I want to see you and I have something for you’. The number didn’t have a name attached to it so I was curious to know who it was.
I walked outside my compound only to see a black G-wagon with tinted side glass parked one block away. I was scared because I didn’t know anyone in school that had a G-wagon.
I moved closer to the car and the back window slowly wind down. Lo and behold, it was Tjay!
End of episode 7