By AMAH’S HEART
“Will you marry me… please?
He asked on his knees.
What is going on here?
I walked in to a surprised gathering, I haven’t seen Phil for days and thought is better to stop by today and say hello.
Ever since I moved into my apartment, we speak more on phone and he came around ones and didn’t stay for long.
He was begining to act cold towards me.
I don’t know what exactly is the problem but I try to be in my best behavior.
It was a Saturday and spending a cool weekend with my man won’t be a bad idea.
Since I promised to get him more birthday gifts, I took the gifts along with me just to surprise him.
I don’t know the reason for his sudden cold attitude towards me but I will try to spice things up. Make him laugh, take him out on a date if he doesn’t mind.
I know he has the money and has taken me out in the past to several dates before our love life went cold. I will take up the mantle and do the needful.
He hardly call or reply messages. Whenever I told him that I was coming around to see him he will tell me that he is either busy or not at home.
Today I will have to surprise him and find out what the problem is. He will get to tell me what I did wrong if there’s any at all. Except if he is just looking for an excuse to dump me.
God, please don’t let it be what I’m thinking.
My birthday was three weeks ago and he did not remember or wish me a happy birthday. It was my first birthday with him and he didn’t even remember.
But during his own three months ago I was the first to wish him well and even promised him more gifts which I’m took along with me now.
He did nothing during mine.
Something was definitely wrong which I decided to go over today without invitation and talk it out.
I also want to surprise him with the things I got
As I got inside his house and saw the gathering of people I almost stepped back.
Phil never told me that he will be having a house party.
I saw his parents standing and cheering along with the rest of the people.
Philip didn’t inform me that his parents were back from London. Is over two weeks I stepped into this house due to he said that he will let me know when he is free for me to come around.
I was indeed surprised to see everyone. Ijeoma was standing and grinning from ear to ear. Stella had a straight face. She was neither looking happy or sad.
No one even noticed my presence as I entered and there he was on his knees.
“… will you marry me?
He pushed the ring forward and the diamond shun so bright.
I watched in a total shock as she covered her mouth and looked from Phil’s parents to the rest of the people gathered.
They were nodding and some where shouting that she should say yes.
She looked towards me and frowned before returning her look to Phil who was still on his knee.
She stretched out her hand with a nod and he put the ring in her finger. He stood and kissed her fully in the mouth while the crowd cheered loudly.
The items in my hands fell off in shock. “What is really going on here?, I asked no one in particular.
“Is engagement party that is going on… isn’t it very obvious…?
I turned and it was Ijeoma, standing beside me while laughing.
“… did i not tell you to enjoy your moment while it last because the real and recognized lady will soon take over. Hahahaha…look at Nenye, our Igbo bride. Isn’t she beautiful? You don’t need to answer that because jealousy and bitterness won’t let you agree… hahaha. Keji, onye ofe mmanu… who invited you here by the way? The boss was done with you immediately his main woman came in from UK with his parents. It was never in his intentions to marry you at all… you wish in your wildest dream. hahahaha. You are just used as an experiment while he wait for Nenye…our soon to be madam. I told you, I warned you that your charms will fail you and now they have. Isn’t it pathetic to think the only son of a business mogul, professor and one of the wealthy Igbo man will want to settle with a nobody like you. Shoes get size and your size is not here. Go and look for it elsewhere. You could have stick to your kitchen job and stop trying to sell your cheap self to our boss. Atleast he has helped your wretched life, go and enjoy all the money you got from him and leave him the hell alone. If you try to do nonsense or create scene here, the securities will bundle you out and you will never smell near here again…onye ofe mmanu. Hahahaha.. very soon you will be sixty years single and searching woman. Maybe one of your old tribal men may pity your miserable life and make you his seventh wife… my ofe mmanu sister hahahaha…
She laughed and walked away. I angrily went straight to where Phil was kissing and dancing with his supposed wife to be. She was waving her hand and showing off the ring on her finger.
I tapped Phil’s shoulder with tears running down my face.
He turned looked at me strangely like he has never met me.
“Why are you doing this to me, what did I ever do to deserve this shame and ridicule? Phil, why…?
I cried out as tears poured from my eyes as I continued to tap him.
His look was troubling, he was either trying to explain or say something when all of a sudden his woman, Nenye rushed towards me and pushed me hard.
I lost my balance and fell to the floor.
Everyone burst out laughing at me on the ground.
As the engaged Nenye was coming towards me again, Phil tries to stop her but she pushed him aside and came to stand where I fell
“You don’t belong here, go and settle in your class. Get lost…onye ofe mmanuuuuuu….
Suddenly, I looked up at her still in tears because her voice sounded so familiar.
Lo and behold it was Ijeoma standing over me with horns sprouting out of her forehead.
I screamed in fear and awaken.
I sat on my bed, breathing so loud like I ran a marathon.
It was all a dream. God! So it was only a bad night mare.
The dream looks and feels so real. Even after waking up I couldn’t just wave it off.
Fear gripped me. I checked the time it was 4:21am in the morning.
I was afraid to sleep back. I remained awake until the full break of the day.
My phone rang while I was still in bed and it was Phil.
I became afraid to pick his call. When I finally picked he said.
“Good morning my love, happy birthday.
My night mare has almost disorganized me and my day. In the dream I have already had my birthday which Phil forgot to call or send message but in reality he was the first to wish me a happy birthday.
“…I’m coming to take you out and give you the best birthday treat.
“Thanks Phil. You really don’t have to, I don’t want to go to anywhere today. I want to remain indoor…
And that’s what I wanted.
“Are you sure Keji? You don’t sound alright…is there a problem? Don’t worry I’m coming over later. I’m coming to cheer you up… and to give you a birthday kiss..
After the call ended, I remained seated in my bed . thinking over my life.
Another birthday came and another year was added. Oh, 32years already.
Why do time has to fly so fast. Why can’t it just take a break let me answer “Mrs” somebody first before it will come.
Phil’s birthday was almost three months before mine.
Phil is just three months older than. He knew and still doesn’t mind if I’m older or his older.
He said my age doesn’t count much to him, all that matters is being with the one he loves. he was still older than me with three months so we aren’t even agemate he teased me one-day.
When I knew his age, after his Dad told me while addressing me in the past, I wanted to hide mine away from him. I thought of reducing my age to 28years instead of telling him that i was thirty-one.
I thought is better he doesn’t know my actual age so it won’t discourage him towards me.
He didn’t ask about my age for months, I was happy and I never mentioned it to his hearing. it was along the line I have to let the cat out of the bag by telling him the truth during one of our discussion. He finally got to know and didn’t count it as anything.
I’m not happy how time is not in my favor at all. I remember saying I wanted to get hooked at 30, get a serious man and get married.
Here I was at 32years still on my high dreams of getting married to my own Chike.
Indeed, life is full of mystery.
And now with this discouraging dream I had, I don’t know what to do.
I don’t even know what to pray about or where to start my day from.
“God.. you already know today is my 32nd birthday. I know I’m not where I used to be, neither am I where I want to be. You have brought me this far and for that I’m grateful. I have list of stuffs I wanted to achieve at this age, my number one on the list is getting married to a nice man. I have dated alot of men in the past before Philip. My present man supersede them all. He humbled me and unknowingly made me a better person I’m deeply grateful for that but I have fears God. My fear is almost close to reality because of what you revealed in the dream last night. I don’t know if is the devil trying to put fear in me, I still don’t know if you are the one trying to warn me. I wish I’m very close to you, and have the power of discernment… God. I’m neither cold nor hot, I’m just there in the middle asking for your help. I don’t know exactly what to ask aside being a Mrs… please search through my heart and do to me as it pleases you but please don’t take Phil away from me because I might just die. In Jesus name I pray Amen.
Phil came around with some goodies for me. Different gifts wrapped in gift bags. I was thrilled but still not very happy.
“, What do you want me to do to make you happy… just mention it and it will be done. Anything Keji… do you want a car? A tour outside the country, maybe for a month..? Talk to me my love, what do you want…
“,I want you to make love to me. That will be the best birthday gift I desire from you.
He sighed heavily as his bright face change into a frown. He became quiet as he stare at nothing in particular. He was quiet, in deep thought.
“Uhmmm Keji! Okay…I will but it won’t be today. Still give me a little time.
“Today is my birthday Phil. I appreciate all this gifts you bought but the best gift you can give me today is what I just mentioned… Phil, I can’t wait anymore. I have tried to bend to your principles, is almost getting to a year, I guess is high time we get down to the main thing. What are your fears, am I not good enough…why can’t we make out in bed? I was a sexual active lady when you met me but I tried to be patient and abide to your rules. I know you are a good man and is hard to find a man so principles and disciplined like you. I’m just tired of waiting…
He took my hands into his and said.
“I’m sorry Keji. I just can’t do what you ask of me… not today. There’s a way that seems right to a man but the end is destruction. It may seem right in a man’s eyes but I grew up with the fear of God imbedded in me, Is not right in God’s eyes. I can’t please my flesh or you to displease God. Be patient with me and your whole wishes will come true. please Keji…
He said pleading.
“Yeah, same old story. No problem Phil. But who is Nenye?
He looked at me confused. The Lady in my dream her name is Nenye, she may truly be the one holding Phil back. He may later dump me. Ijeoma has mocked me and said a whole lot of things in that dream. I won’t open my eyes and watch soap enter them.
“What are you talking about Keji? Nenye??…who is Nenye?
He asked me back same question I asked him.
I can’t start narrating the whole dream to him, he may thinks I’m crazy.
“Never mind. Let’s forget it.
He try forcing me to say what I was talking about but I told him I was just messing with his head.
He stayed with me almost the whole day and later left.
I was arranging the whole gifts Philip bought for me when my phone rang. Unsaved number.
I picked up and the person started singing a birthday song to me.
His voice sounds masculine and familiar as I try to guess.
The caller finally said.
“Hi Keji, longest time… Happy birthday my run away girlfriend. I just saw it on my old social media accounts. This is Lukemon. How are you doing… have really missed you…
Oh my goodness, Lukemon the jewelry dealer, my ex boyfriend.
I was happy to hear from him as we go talking and laughing. Bringing back old memories and what we shared together before a misunderstanding happened and I have to leave back then.
He apologized again for what happened in the past.
He wanted to know if I was already married but I told him I was still single but in a relationship though.
Lukemon wanted to come around the following day just to say hi.
At first I didn’t want tl him to but I later sent him an address because I saw nothing wrong with it.
He drove down the next day and we had a great chat in the fine apartment that Phil got for me.
Lukemon wasn’t as rich as before but he was okay. He even got me some birthday gifts. Jewelries and bottles of wine.
He asked me how serious was my present relationship and I told him we are serious enough.
We drank and laugh together, I opened up and told him how my present guy is a “no sex guy”. I have to wait until he is ready.
Lukemon laughed and said Phil was probably impotent. No sensible man will not get wet on setting eyes on me. That ever since he got in he has been trying to control his manhood from embarrassing him.
We laughed it out.
One thing led to another and we kissed, had a long romance in the sitting room floor. As we were about to take it to another level like I have so wished Phil will do, I stopped Lukemon.
I just couldn’t. It unfair if I do this to Phil but my body yawn so loudly at what Lukemon was offering.
I was almost out of breath with the hot romance we had but I gathered courage to say no.
I picked up my cloths from where I threw it.
“I can’t Luke, I just can’t…my boyfriend is a nice person. I can’t do this to him.
“,He won’t have to know. He is obviously impotent, not man enough to want you. You want me Keji… your body is saying differently while your mouth speaks differently. I have really missed you…so much. I wish to have you back. I’m willing to do anything Keji…
He was holding me from behind and kissing my neck and ear. I was seriously struggling to resist. It was very difficult. We had another round of crazy kissing but I stopped him again and asked him to leave.
He pleaded but I wasn’t ready to oblige.
Lukemon later left.
I sat on the ground wondering what I just did.
There was no penetration, that’s consoling but we did things I haven’t done with Phil.
Phil was always gentle whenever we kiss but with Lukemon it was crazy.
I wanted more but my conscience wouldn’t let me do it.
I try to act like nothing happened and kept it going.
Lukemon calls and texts me after then.
He came around twice but we only had few romance and I try to strongly avoid making out with him.
It was very hard but I still manage to say “no”
Three weeks later Phil took me out on a date.
He booked the entire lounged just for us.
As we sat together, sipping our wine, he brought out a tiny box and said.
“Please marry me….?
I looked around me, wondering if I’m really the one he was talking to.
…will you Keji? I have always wanted to do this for a very long time but one thing or the other kept obstructing. We are finally here and I felt is time to take our relationship to the next level. I love you dearly for being so patient with me. I can say I have made a better choice by choosing you… Keji, will you marry me?
I stare at him with the open small box in his hand that has the most beautiful crystal diamond ring I have ever seen. Almost the same type I saw in my dream.
He was sitting on a chair opposite me. A soft music by Phil Collins was playing in the background. I thought of Lukemon and guilt washed all over me
“…. does it looks odd because I’m not on my knee? My apologies Keji, I thought you won’t mind. Let me do that…
He stood, move back his chair and went on one knee.
“No… no.. Phil, it makes no difference to me whether you lie down or stand up. I’m just speechless on whaa…I mean you took me by surprise…I….will…I
He remained on his knees as I went on with my confused rant.
I pause and looked at him all over.
He was in a wine color blazer, white Jamestown shirt, a chinos dark royal blue trouser, a swede cover black shoe with flower designs and a Rolex wristwatch.
This young man can sweep Ladies off their feet.
He was looking dazzling in his appearance and all I have done all day was to stare in wonder.
He was too good to be true. Oh God, how could I have even allowed Lukemon to touch me.
I wish I knew what Phil was planing all this while.
I was just running out of patient due to the long delay. Why didn’t he tell me or give me sign?
Why didn’t he proposed on my birthday. I wouldn’t have allowed Lukemon to come over.
“… Keji…will you marry me?
He asked again. I can’t believe that he was asking me, a nobody like me to marry him.
“,Yes Phil. I will marry you…
Maybe I will keep whatever that happened between I and Lukemon a secret. I will ask him to stop calling, texting or coming around.
I’m finally going to be a “Mrs” not just ordinary one but “Mrs Kanu”.
God has finally answered my prayer.
I don’t know why I still have troubling feeling.
Is it better for me to confess to Phil about my love escapee with Lukemon or allow it to remain in the past, a secret?
I don’t want anything that will come between me and Philip. Not now or ever.